Turns out Jump Freighter pilots are dumber than normal Freighter pilots...
o7
I've been wanting to make a post about what I've been doing recently, but didn't feel like I was ready to do so... until now. I've been very busy for the past two and a half months as all I've done in EVE Online is hyperdunking. I would like to take the time to thank Globby for making this method well-known and taking his time to help and explain to others. I would be foolish not to thank my partners in crime Ben, Masao, and Soban for making me not (as)shit, testing mechanics, and min-maxing this method.
I have hyperdunked 37 freighters and 5 Jump Freighters in these short two and a half months, and it's been a retarded amount of fun. I've made somewhere in the neighborhood of 60b through scooping the loot from dunks, dueling, and ransoming Freighters. I went from relying heavily on others such as Ben, Masao, Toxic, Father Chemino, Deekz, Soban and Cyclo to do the bumping, loot scooping, and extra dps; to being able to dunk online / active Freighters and Jump Freighters completely solo.
I spent a short period in Goonswarm only because I wanted to gank with Miniluv, but quickly found out that their "style" really isn't my thing. I don't gank to be someone's F1 monkey, and I think too highly of myself to be that. I enjoy ganking with others but I do it as an easy way to plex my accounts. I found out pretty easily that Goonswarm wasn't for me when I scouted and bumped an 18.7b GClub (red) Freighter and was only given a measly 500m. I also ran into issues where I was regularly being told who I could and couldn't kill because they were "blue" with the Imperium. That's cool and all, but it tortured me that I couldn't kill some of these huge-ass retarded whales just because they had an Imperium main. So I was fully set on leaving and had managed to rack up a few "blue" kills in the process: Elginn #1, Elginn #2 (this one was a duel... I knew that I couldn't cause another diplomatic mess after the first kill so I had my friends bump and duel him while I scooped loot). So I left Goonswarm and found love and support from my small group of friends...
The groundwork has been laid out and now it's time to really tell you guys the reason behind this post. I hyperdunked a 40-ish billion isk FCON Jump Freighter in Jita last night. I have a few methods that I use to find, bump, and dunk Freighters and Jump Freighters but last night was some good old fashioned bumping off of a gate. I scanned him and saw 25 plastic wraps, got him off grid and Soban and I started setting up to gank while I maintained low-velocity bumps. I decide to convo him and "ransom" him for 1b, but before I can get it out he says "im imperium". That's probably one of the biggest jokes about Imperium in hisec. They think that because Miniluv ganks that they should be immune to ganking while hauling obscene amounts, which I gladly prove otherwise...
So we continue to dunk him and someone in a pod warps to the Rhea and is just sitting there. Shortly after someone in a Raptor appears, but seems to only be looting our bomber wrecks. We finally pop him and I burn the Machariel in closer to get a peek at whats inside. I have multiple panic attacks as I find that all 25 wraps were tightly bound up into one courier contract. I immediately go into panic mode as I'm screaming for Soban to get his Freighter in to loot. The pod comes back in an Ibis and tries to pop the wreck, but luckily is unable to before our already-on-grid concord spawns stop him. In the middle of all the panic Soban lands his freighter, aligns, and misclicks the loot all button before going into warp (yes, it happened). So I'm trying to remain calm, but know that there's not much of anything I can do at all to stop someone from swooping in to pop the wreck. I tell Soban to refit for istabs and I drop a Mobile Micro Jump Drive on top of the wreck to enable a quick getaway. Soban lands at the exact same time a Catalyst does. Luckily for us we manage to loot, activate the MMJD thrusting us 100km forward, align out, warp, and dock up safely before the Catalyst has time to lock and pop the wreck.
Evepraisal of all the loot
When something like this happens everyone is always filled with lots of questions. Why didn't he cyno out? Why didn't he bring logi? Why didn't he cry for help? Why didn't he have a webber and/or proper support with him? The answers to these questions are elusive and no amount of pondering will bring reason to an event like this. I don't really care why he didn't do any of these things, because I enjoy profiting from the actions of REALLY stupid people. I wish I could write more but this has already turned into a huge wall of text. I have a LOT of chat porn, screenshots, and other funny stories of my experiences since I've started hyperdunking. One day I might just compile all my funny stories into a mini-series and release one every month or so.
If any of you have any questions or are interested in this sort of thing, just shoot me a mail!
Fly Dangerously,
Faylee Freir
 |
| Riding off into the sunset with cargo-holds full! |
I've been wanting to make a post about what I've been doing recently, but didn't feel like I was ready to do so... until now. I've been very busy for the past two and a half months as all I've done in EVE Online is hyperdunking. I would like to take the time to thank Globby for making this method well-known and taking his time to help and explain to others. I would be foolish not to thank my partners in crime Ben, Masao, and Soban for making me not (as)shit, testing mechanics, and min-maxing this method.
I have hyperdunked 37 freighters and 5 Jump Freighters in these short two and a half months, and it's been a retarded amount of fun. I've made somewhere in the neighborhood of 60b through scooping the loot from dunks, dueling, and ransoming Freighters. I went from relying heavily on others such as Ben, Masao, Toxic, Father Chemino, Deekz, Soban and Cyclo to do the bumping, loot scooping, and extra dps; to being able to dunk online / active Freighters and Jump Freighters completely solo.
I spent a short period in Goonswarm only because I wanted to gank with Miniluv, but quickly found out that their "style" really isn't my thing. I don't gank to be someone's F1 monkey, and I think too highly of myself to be that. I enjoy ganking with others but I do it as an easy way to plex my accounts. I found out pretty easily that Goonswarm wasn't for me when I scouted and bumped an 18.7b GClub (red) Freighter and was only given a measly 500m. I also ran into issues where I was regularly being told who I could and couldn't kill because they were "blue" with the Imperium. That's cool and all, but it tortured me that I couldn't kill some of these huge-ass retarded whales just because they had an Imperium main. So I was fully set on leaving and had managed to rack up a few "blue" kills in the process: Elginn #1, Elginn #2 (this one was a duel... I knew that I couldn't cause another diplomatic mess after the first kill so I had my friends bump and duel him while I scooped loot). So I left Goonswarm and found love and support from my small group of friends...
The groundwork has been laid out and now it's time to really tell you guys the reason behind this post. I hyperdunked a 40-ish billion isk FCON Jump Freighter in Jita last night. I have a few methods that I use to find, bump, and dunk Freighters and Jump Freighters but last night was some good old fashioned bumping off of a gate. I scanned him and saw 25 plastic wraps, got him off grid and Soban and I started setting up to gank while I maintained low-velocity bumps. I decide to convo him and "ransom" him for 1b, but before I can get it out he says "im imperium". That's probably one of the biggest jokes about Imperium in hisec. They think that because Miniluv ganks that they should be immune to ganking while hauling obscene amounts, which I gladly prove otherwise...
 |
| Typical comment from an Imperium alt... |
So we continue to dunk him and someone in a pod warps to the Rhea and is just sitting there. Shortly after someone in a Raptor appears, but seems to only be looting our bomber wrecks. We finally pop him and I burn the Machariel in closer to get a peek at whats inside. I have multiple panic attacks as I find that all 25 wraps were tightly bound up into one courier contract. I immediately go into panic mode as I'm screaming for Soban to get his Freighter in to loot. The pod comes back in an Ibis and tries to pop the wreck, but luckily is unable to before our already-on-grid concord spawns stop him. In the middle of all the panic Soban lands his freighter, aligns, and misclicks the loot all button before going into warp (yes, it happened). So I'm trying to remain calm, but know that there's not much of anything I can do at all to stop someone from swooping in to pop the wreck. I tell Soban to refit for istabs and I drop a Mobile Micro Jump Drive on top of the wreck to enable a quick getaway. Soban lands at the exact same time a Catalyst does. Luckily for us we manage to loot, activate the MMJD thrusting us 100km forward, align out, warp, and dock up safely before the Catalyst has time to lock and pop the wreck.
Evepraisal of all the loot
 |
| Thanks for the loot breh |
If any of you have any questions or are interested in this sort of thing, just shoot me a mail!
Fly Dangerously,
Faylee Freir
This sounds amazing! I'd message you in-game but I can't for a while. I'm new to the hyperdunking idea, but would love to be able to do this. Sounds like 2 accounts can do this correct? Just need a bumper, and then the dps applier with ships at a safe not far from where the bumping is happening? Maybe a 3rd would be better as the scooper? Let me know. Looking for some good advice.
ReplyDeleteJust contact me in-game
DeleteCongrats shooting shit that can't shoot back. The adrenaline rush must be amazing...
ReplyDeleteCool. You keep getting excited about pleb-like 300m kills and I'll stay where I'm at killing more than some alliances do in a month. Please show me where I can participate in the most elite of elite pvp.
DeleteNo way I can do that. How can anything be more exciting than shooting shit that doesn't shoot back, and then comparing a spreadsheet to look at numbers? You win Eve.
DeleteI be Faylee had a lot more fun than all people trying to find fair 1v1 with their merlins combined shooting this ship.
DeleteBut I understand if this is too hard to understand if you're a pleb.