Horse Thieving

o7

I'm going to start you off with this video because it's bad ass; then I'll get to the meat and potatoes.

We all remember my last post when I had a unique encounter with a certain "special" dumb individual. I did a good job of exposing just how weak and vulnerable he is, but I had no idea that his lack of brain function was only revealing the tip of the iceberg. I was very pleased with my previous performance and made it a habit of checking in with Lance. I took the opportunity to get to know a little about him through casual conversation, all which was really just to remind him that his payment for July's moon rent in Otela was coming up soon. I remember asking him questions about what exactly he does and what he's interested in, mainly because I'm always curious what stupid people have in their possession. I learn that he's sick and tired of the chump change isk /hour in Hi-Sec, and is really interested in exploring his options out in Null-Sec. Alarms are going off in my head as I see this as the perfect opportunity to start gaining his trust. We talk a good while about how I used to multi-box mine with ten accounts (ashamedly true) out in null while employed with Big Diggers (before I stole 50b), and while none of this information is really interesting at all to a person with a fully-functioning brain; I use it to plant the seed in his mind that I am experienced, knowledgeable, and a carebear at heart (false). I let his hopes and dreams of being space-rich stew inside him for a few days, before I contact him about joining my industrial corp.

I take a couple of days to plant seeds in Lance's mind that moving out to null with us is going to be a profitable venture, and am surprised to see how eager he is to drop everything and follow me. I don't know if I can explain what is going through my head when I'm molding the mind of a weak person, but Deekz tells me all the time that I over-think everything; but that's just part of the game for me. So the whole time I talk or type, I'm constantly thinking about what I say or do and how that is going to make someone think or react. I always have a goal in mind but allow the experience to flow freely as I'm thinking a few steps ahead. The best way I can explain it is that if I'm engaging in communication with you, I'm considering the emotions and direction in every word as the conversation twists and branches off like a confusing interstate system. Yeah... enough about how my twisted mind works, so lets get back to the good stuff. 

I know that I can't go straight for the throat, because in this case it would take a little prep work. I needed to wait until I knew he was going to commit before I started talking about ISK and what it takes to move out there. Luckily it didn't take long and I was able to tell him about how Deekz and I have already started buying all we needed for the big move. I proceed to talk between the three of us and casually bring up that I've put in roughly 11b and Deekz has done 13b. He seems shocked that we would commit such a large sum of ISK to the project, and is still completely on board when I tell him I'm going to send him a list of some of the remaining necessary items we need before we start moving. I have no idea how much he has in either ISK or assets, but I figure he will let us know when he runs out or is at his limit. We go about 24 hours in which I pretty much make myself sick with nervousness and anticipation. Would he really send us everything off this list? My over-thinking-everything brain starts racing as the possibility of him not being that stupid, but I'm quickly proven wrong.

5.11b according to Evepraisal!

I am super relieved and insanely happy at this point as Deekz and I celebrate our small victory. While the estimated 5.11b is great, it wasn't enough. I knew that through previous conversation that he was interested in flying a Legion and a Tengu, so while we wait for Deekz to sort through the assets I bring up ratting and anoms. I really don't know a lot about ratting or anoms, but I figure he doesn't either so I decide to ham it up a good bit to see if anything juicy surfaces. I drop my poopsock as he reveals that he can fly Marauders and even has a Paladin! We both chuckle as I tell him to imagine afk mining with his alts while he runs sites with us in his Paladin, and I know for sure I've got him. It takes him a while to consolidate all of his assets to prep for contract, and we chat about where exactly we're going to live. Yeah, that's right at this point he still doesn't even know which region we're going to be moving to. Time goes on, but it's not long before we start receiving his personal assets he's wanting to bring. We had no idea exactly what to expect...

2.4b according to Evepraisal!

129.67m according to Evepraisal!

While we were super happy to get more out of him, I was bummed to not see a Paladin. I start to think that he's holding out, and decide it was time to get his full API's. I proceed with a plan to not raise any questions when I ask for his API, and it works out beautifully. I tell him that I'm setting up authentication software for our voice server that will keep it secure from spies. It will of course associate trusted members with their API keys stored safely in a database that no one has access to. He hands over all of his full / account-wide APIs and we begin combing through everything. We immediately spot 1.3b liquid and 2.3b in active sell orders. We see where he sold his Paladin, and had up an Obelisk and some ice, so naturally I start thinking about how we're going to squeeze the last bit from him. My mind is racing as I'm going through natural dialog paths, likely reactions, and how to best handle the situation. I had about 3 unique plans that I could try, so I started running them by the guys... At this point Deekz and I were joined by Toxic Yaken and Cyclo Hexanol and we decided that the best plan was actually going to be the hardest and most entertaining.

Deekz was posing as our jump freighter pilot, and I was going to help him by lighting his cynos. Toxic and Cyclo were going to play the part of scary (but honorable) nullsec pirates. The plan was to to have them catch the jump freighter as we land on the other side of the cyno and immediately start ransoming us. The rough details were explained, and some of the key points harped on excessively so I felt like we had a good shot at this.

I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SHOW TO START!

Scene One

Deekz and I get into mumble and talk for a bit before we're joined by Lance. We do a lot of small talk about what we're excited to do when we get our "home" setup, and I inform him that Deekz and I are actually about to start moving the jump freighter. I ask Deekz if he's ready for the first cyno and explain that I'm going to initiate a count down from three, where he'll jump at the count of one. He acknowledges the instructions and I start counting, "Three, Two, One...". I cannot believe that my computer just crashed... What seems like a major annoyance, actually played out to be perfect timing, because as soon as I rebooted and hopped back in comms Deekz had immediately started screaming on mumble that he was tackled. I snap back into my role and immediately start telling him to calm down, sit tight, and that I was batphoning. Deekz did a good job at sounding panicked and even our friend Lance is trying to help the situation by keeping Deekz calm. Deekz announces that he has (10) T3 cruisers on grid and that a Toxic Yaken was requesting a private chat. Toxic demands that if Deekz wants to keep the jump freighter that we follow him into his teamspeak to discuss terms of ransom. Deeks hands out the IP where Lance and I follow him. I immediately notice that Cyclo is nowhere to be found and I start to worry. Toxic messages me Cyclo's internet had gone down and wouldn't be able to help. I make best of the situation and the ransoming starts as I'm relaying messages to Toxic from under the table of our private conversation. I tell him to demand 8b and he'll let us go.

Scene Two

[ 2015.06.30 06:05:46 ] Faylee Freir > I have some isk
[ 2015.06.30 06:05:46 ] Deekz > Fuck, I can't cover that
[ 2015.06.30 06:05:53 ] Lucass Deninard > uhmm
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:01 ] Faylee Freir > Sending him some now
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:02 ] Lucass Deninard > what are we gonna do?
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:12 ] Faylee Freir > We need to pay this shit.
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:13 ] Deekz > We don't have much of a choice
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:16 ] Faylee Freir > I kno
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:18 ] Lucass Deninard > we have no choice
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:28 ] Deekz > I recognize their FC, he's pretty well known for catching JFs
[ 2015.06.30 06:06:39 ] Faylee Freir > I have 2b liquid right now. No free assets.
[ 2015.06.30 06:07:02 ] Deekz > I'v got about 2.3b in my wallet and nothing else
[ 2015.06.30 06:07:14 ] Deekz > That's not 8...
[ 2015.06.30 06:07:19 ] Lucass Deninard > i only have 1.2 b
[ 2015.06.30 06:07:21 ] Faylee Freir > Sending him now
[ 2015.06.30 06:07:57 ] Deekz > Shit, I'll send him mine
[ 2015.06.30 06:08:07 ] Faylee Freir > Lucass Deninard we will give you shit when we land in station. We're going to dock immediately when this is done
[ 2015.06.30 06:08:15 ] Faylee Freir > Send to Toxic Yaken
[ 2015.06.30 06:08:19 ] Lucass Deninard > how much??
[ 2015.06.30 06:08:50 ] Faylee Freir > Do the 1.2 man. Like I said we will pay back from our own stash
[ 2015.06.30 06:09:13 ] Lucass Deninard > 2 bill sent fuck it
[ 2015.06.30 06:09:24 ] Lucass Deninard > sold somethin
[ 2015.06.30 06:09:32 ] Faylee Freir > You have more to sell?
[ 2015.06.30 06:09:40 ] Faylee Freir > damnit
[ 2015.06.30 06:09:55 ] Deekz > I can't find anything in my assets worth a damn
[ 2015.06.30 06:10:05 ] Lucass Deninard > i have nothing left lol
[ 2015.06.30 06:10:27 ] Faylee Freir > Assets on the market or anything in Jita?
[ 2015.06.30 06:10:32 ] Faylee Freir > I just canceled some sell orders
[ 2015.06.30 06:10:33 ] Deekz > They started shooting again, fuck
[ 2015.06.30 06:10:36 ] Faylee Freir > going to contract him some ships
[ 2015.06.30 06:10:38 ] Faylee Freir > FUCK
[ 2015.06.30 06:11:46 ] Deekz > OK, I found a couple BS I can contract. One min

The entire time this went on Toxic would announce the fake payments from Deekz and I, while screaming, "MORE, MORE, MORE! It's not enough! Do you want to lose everything you have in this jump freighter?". Toxic does a beautiful job playing his role, and Deekz and I do a great job of making him feel like he needs to pay the ransom. Toxic informs us that he has 3b from Lucas, so we decided that enough is enough.

ARRRRRRG!

The Finale

The next 5 minutes are spent with Toxic stalling, while Deekz and I decide if we should have the jump freighter "blown up" and possibly get the last few hundred million isk he has left, or if we should end it. I am once again reminded that I put too much thought into it, and to just make a decision. I was happy with the whole project thus far and had a great deal of fun in the process, so I decided it was time to come clean with Lance. No, he didn't cry or beg us and while he was upset at the events that took place; it didn't seem to cause him any real distress.

Lance left teamspeak and Deekz, Toxic, and I were left to do our victory laps. The moments right after a theft or scam takes place are the best, mainly because they are fresh and you're sitting there in awe about what actually had just happened. I knew the plan would work, because hey... if you've dumped almost 9b in a jump freighter, wouldn't you be shaking your wallet out looking for any amount of ISK to save it? Thefts like these are fun, mainly because all it took was communication. I didn't have to do anything or fly anywhere, and from start to finish I was happily doing other activities. I'm glad I got to get my friends in on it, and while keeping the entire loot pile to myself seems better to others; I'm someone that cares more about the friends I did it with and the fun we had. In case you had forgotten in the midst of all this scamming, Lance still has his POS up in Otela and will still be owing Rent for July. I contacted him to hammer out those details...

[ 2015.06.30 16:26:38 ] Lance Pares > what do you want?
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:02 ] Faylee Freir > I want to check in about next month's rent.
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:14 ] Lance Pares > this is the last time we are speaking
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:17 ] Lance Pares > after what you did
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:27 ] Faylee Freir > So you're moving your pos?
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:31 ] Lance Pares > no
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:33 ] Lance Pares > im not
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:43 ] Faylee Freir > So you're paying the rent?
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:46 ] Lance Pares > nope
[ 2015.06.30 16:27:51 ] Faylee Freir > May I ask why?
[ 2015.06.30 16:29:03 ] Lance Pares > why the hell would i do that i was nothing but nice to you willing to work with you all i wanted to have was new friends in this game and you just completely ruined my game experience you dont deserve any isk from me.
[ 2015.06.30 16:29:35 ] Faylee Freir > That moon is mine.
[ 2015.06.30 16:29:57 ] Lance Pares > yeah well
[ 2015.06.30 16:30:01 ] Lance Pares > the 10 b worth of stuff
[ 2015.06.30 16:30:02 ] Lance Pares > is mine to
[ 2015.06.30 16:30:50 ] Faylee Freir > Well
[ 2015.06.30 16:31:34 ] Faylee Freir > Well technically you have nothing to bargain with.
[ 2015.06.30 16:31:42 ] Faylee Freir > Only the last bit of isk you have.
[ 2015.06.30 16:32:49 ] Faylee Freir > I do have an alternate ending for you though.
[ 2015.06.30 16:33:20 ] Lance Pares > and what would that be
[ 2015.06.30 16:33:20 ] Faylee Freir > I have a friend that is getting some guys together to start something out in Lowsec. Their ultimate goal is to make it big in null. He'd love to have you join them.
[ 2015.06.30 16:36:21 ] Faylee Freir > Well, I take that as a no.
[ 2015.06.30 16:36:39 ] Lance Pares > im done wit you there is nothing left to be said you wont give me my stuff back you ruin the game for people whatever i wont be speaking to you any longer.
[ 2015.06.30 16:36:43 ] Faylee Freir > Last time I'm going to tell you though. Pay your rent or get off my moon.
[ 2015.06.30 16:37:05 ] Lance Pares > good bye faylee freir you were cool till you did this.
[ 2015.06.30 16:37:21 ] Faylee Freir > PAY.
[ 2015.06.30 16:37:22 ] Faylee Freir > MY.
[ 2015.06.30 16:37:24 ] Faylee Freir > RENT.

 

Looks like the final count adds up to somewhere around 10.6b, without factoring in things like our blueprints and their research. Here's the evepraisals if you're interested in what we actually got: Contract #1, Contract #2, Contract #3, and the 3b in liquid. With our wallets fattened and our spirits high, we rode off into the sunset. I'm sure this isn't the last time we'll see Lucas, and I hope that future encounters prove to be just as profitable!